CORPORAL FLYNN TAGGART
ftaggart4@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Objective:
To kill stuff. Ugly stuff. Ugly stuff with horns.
Major Qualifications:
* Over ten years experience in killing ugly stuff with horns.
* Highly motivated, results oriented killing machine with a long, gory
trail
of demon corpses of increasing size and ugliness.
* Department of Defense Super-Really-Ultra-Secret Security Clearance.
Professional Experience:
* Blew up demonic assets totaling in excess of $10,000,000,000.
* Quarterly obliteration of up to $1,000,000 in UAC hardware to keep them
from opening that damn portal to Hell again.
* Excessive violence on a daily basis.
* Responsible for shooting, punching, and tearing apart of over 100
cyberdemons, for the safety of everyone who ain't a cyberdemon.
Employment History:
August 2694 - Present United States Space Marine Corps
March 2702 - Present Demon Killing Supervisor
Responsible for the following: Planning for deployment of ammunition into
monsters; Supervision of electronic switch-pulling; Preparation of budgets
for
whoever sweeps up all the corpses and lights all these torches; Brief
commander on equipment readiness, but all my recruits got eaten, it's a
long
story.
July 2700 - March 2702 Dimensional Gate Security
Supervisor
Assisted in the planning for deployment of dimensional gate technology -
well,
actually I just tooled around Phobos and made fun of the scientists. But
they
all got eaten - long story - so I guess they don't mind now.
March 2698 - July 2700 Radio/Multi-Channel
Something-or-other
Analyzed maintenance information system data, which is let me tell you
boring
as hell. Not like Communications. They used their connection to Earth
Control
to download a bunch of 3D porn, after getting around the firewall. I don't
know how, you'd think with the lightspeed lag would make hacking attempts
OBVIOUS, but no, the Comm officers on Earth must be jerking off more than
the
ones on Phobos, if that's possible. Conducted training for personnel, but
most
of them were later eaten. Long story.
October 2695 - March 2698 Radio/Multi-Channel Equipment
Repairman
Stuff broke. I fixed it. My CO was a real jerk, but he later got turned
into a
zombie - long story - so I shot him. Felt good. He was then eaten by a
hungry
demon. I shot the demon, too.
Management and Technical Training:
2695 Basic Electronics Course
Learning about switches.
2695 Radio Fundamentals Course
Learning about switches that do things in other rooms.
2695 Multi-Channel Equipment Repair Course
Learning about things that need multiple switches hit.
2696 Terrorism Counteraction
Damn suicide bomber DEHes.
2696 Techniques of Instruction
When to scream and when to simply yell.
2696 Fundamentals of Leadership
Learning to wait for everyone else to get killed before
grabbing for a gun. Everyone who took this course is dead now. Except me,
but
then again, I failed this one twice before I scared them enough that they
pushed me through.
2696 Solid State Devices
Useless. It's not like those computer panels DO anything.
2700 Electrician Course
Learning what those green lights on large switch panels
mean.
2704 Microwave Principles
Learning that some switches that control elevators halfway
across the damn map.
2704 Electronics Technician Supervisors Course
Learning to sit around and tell everyone else what
switches
look like.
Skills and Strengths:
* Eradication, elimination, extermination, shotgun-assisted face
modification,
and testing of really big guns.
* Microsoft Office 2666.
* Strong organizational skills; able to prioritize and decide who needs to
be
killed first.
* Excellent team builder and motivator. Have started many inter-species
fights.
* Personable and articulate on the rare occasions I'm around someone who
speaks in more than moans and gurgles.
* Project oriented; tries to get 100% kills whenever possible. Also tries
for
100% items and secrets.
* Creative and innovative problem solver. Hate checkerboard puzzles,
though.
* Easily adaptable at learning new concepts. Like jumping.
* Effective manager of time and resources. Time rarely sucks.
Awards:
* Space Marine Corps Commendation Medal (14)
* Space Corps Achievement Medal (47)
* Certificate of Ultra-Violence (42)
* Letter of Lucubration (69)
* You read that last one wrong, go back and read it again, carefully.
Supervisor Evaluations and References:
* They were all eaten. Long story.
--
Pointless sig file.
http://www.archonrealm.com
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Replace "Doom!" with "Hotmail" to send e-mail.
End pointless sig file.
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