Recent "truths", by Mickey Ben Tovim (a.k.a. Micky Marine, Micky Mouth
et. al.)
WARNING: Do not drink while reading this
"I am an Israeli"
"I am an American"
"People think I'm Italian"
"I have a B'rooklyn accent you could cut with a chainsaw"
"I served with the IDF"
"I served with the US Marines"
"I was wounded in Vietnam"
"I was decorated in Vietnam"
"I wasn't even in Vietnam most of the time"
"I played bridge with Omar Sharif"
"I am a multi-millionaire"
"I drive a Ferrari"
"I own 1.65 million shares of Comcast"
"My grandchildren couldn't spend all the money I made"
"I would starve on $250 million"
"I'm retired"
"I work as a systems analyst in Detroit"
"I get paid $155 an hour"
"I live in Tiberias, Israel"
"I live in Sarasota, Florida"
"I have an apartment in NYC"
"I have an apartment in Atlanta"
"I have an apartment in California"
"I own property in London"
"I have a home (sic) in Bern"
"I like to eat myself into a stu****"
"My wife is half-Italian"
"My wife is half-Scottish"
"My wife is Native American"
"My wife is jewish"
"I'm hung like a horse"
"I don't need Viagra"
"I have nine children"
"My eldest son died in his sleep"
"My dead son was a Presbyterian"
"I have MS"
"Radavich is a jew"
"Radavich is a Serbian child-molestor"
"Radavich is afraid I'll trap his IP address"
"I pissed on the bathroom wall in Seredin's shop"
"The Broward - Palm Beach New Times re****ter was objective"
"The Broward - Palm Beach New Times re****ter used poetic (sic)
licence"
"I offered to pay Radovich's fare to Florida"
"The UN didn't create Israel, God did"
"I am a bullet-riddled half-cripple"
"I have proved everything I've said"
But the best I saved for last:
"If you and she are examples of what jewish women have come to, I'm
glad I didn't marry one. I would bet you could nag a man to death as
well."
Oh, we could go on for days, but you get the picture.
